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Ren has no idea what to do, so he just...clings.

I wish you could— even half as much as I— With a harsh, strangled sound, he tries to pull himself from their triple embrace. But there's no strength behind his effort; he goes limp, and finally, his head collapses against Crow's.

I hate you, he thinks; it springs easily to his lips, like it always has. "I hate this," he amends, muffled. "Hate it."

Crow presses his chin atop Magpie's head, holding him close. "It would be so much simpler if that Palace wasn't hanging over our heads. I..." Words. He needs to find the right words. "I just don't want to lose anyone. I'm not saying you have to like Drake, or Glitch, or anyone in particular. And for what it's worth, I am grateful that you agreed to participate."

Snuggling up against Ren, his Shadow hums. "Your grudge has put him under quite a bit of pressure. Of course, the same can be said for Glitch and Drake. They aren't faultless by any means. Drake absolutely hurt Crow, and while I can't agree with how you confronted Drake, that doesn't change the fact that you did so from a place of caring."

"I didn't." Without lifting his head, he mutters against Crow. "None of you get it. I just wanted to keep him away from me. I couldn't stand what had happened. I made sure he knew it."

Crow's Shadow is right, of course, in large part.

"You mentioned me multiple times within that thread, and the entire discussion centered about how he treated me. You threatened him for me, and you also talked me through the situation beforehand, invited me out to coffee..."

Here, Magpie. Have a little squeeze. "You took me to Mementos to blow off steam... If it were as simple as pushing Drake away, you wouldn't have bothered." Heh. "After everything you've done for me, I was furious about the way Glitch spoke about you. It's why I acted so... aggressively, back in the Palace. I refused to let her control the conversation. They haven't seen the sides of you that we have. But even at your worst, you still deserve to be loved. The whole reason I came on so strong about those texts was because I'd seen you at your best."

He pauses, in part to catch his breath. "But I misstepped, so I'll take responsibility for it and work harder in the future."

Edited 2024-07-15 04:30 (UTC)

"Oh, fuck Frog and fuck the Palace. You didn't misstep." There it is again, that part of him that steps up for Crow no matter what. He even lifts his head briefly.

"But I did. You were already distressed enough after the texts, and even though Raven was there for you, I should have known you weren't in the best mental state before I sprung something like that at you. I hurt you, when that was the last thing I wanted, and I made you think I didn't value you for who you truly are."

He's still not letting go.

His Shadow starts stroking Ren's curls just to help Ren through this rather awkward situation. Here, have a lil' nuzzle for good measure.

... huh. It actually hadn't occurred to him that he was the misstep. "I wasn't distressed," he says, numbly.

Should he try to explain? To brush against a little of his thinking? Would it serve a purpose, when the only effect of it all appears to have been to spawn this damned Palace? He thinks not. "I suppose I—misstepped too. With you," he clarifies. It's an apology, of sorts.

"It wouldn't be the first time, and I doubt it'll be the last, but we've certainly overcome worse miscommunications." There's a whisper of a laugh, though he remains in place. "I won't pressure you, but I genuinely would like to understand better. It could help us in the future to avoid situations such as this, where you feel like you aren't being seen or heard to a satisfactory degree."

But he lowers his head again, determined not to shudder, relaxing hair by hair despite himself. "I don't know what you expect me to say. I'm just not like you. I never will be. I thought he was like me. He isn't. That's all."

Thanks, Magpie.

"...You were trying to connect. Because he underwent similar anguish as you." Crow quiets as it all sinks in. Those words weren't just about Drake. They were self-loathing. "It was never just about him..."

Edited 2024-07-15 05:25 (UTC)

"Please." Magpie looks up, eyes flashing, desperate for a rock to hide beneath. But he flinched, harder than he could conceal, and all of them will know it.

"I am a detective, after all. Your reaction just now proves that I'm onto something." But it's okay. He even takes a chance and brushes his fingers against Magpie's hair. "You know, Drake's Shadow said something... interesting, when he blocked our path. If you're in the right mindset for it, I can share, though I'm not certain it'll provide reassurance so much as clarity for what lies ahead."

He's not sure he wants to know at all—but he screws his eyes up tight, struggling with himself, rather than pull away from Crow's touch, from his smile. Warmth fights to make its way through the ice in his heart. "Why not. May as well get the bad news out of the way."

Ren can't help but adjust his grasp on Crow and Magpie and Hiro. He is hugging, still, but his arm is starting to fall asleep.

Crow continues lightly stroking Magpie's hair. Anything to offer reassurance with what's to come. A deep breath in, a slow exhale out.

"He said, and I quote, 'Good luck getting Magpie to turn back the clock.'" Crow gives it a moment to sink in. "It may be possible that some subconscious part of Drake genuinely does wish things could be different between you two, or perhaps misses how things were when you were children. I'm not going to say you need to forgive him or accept him, but it is highly possible that you will have to put work in toward understanding him."

He pauses.

"But you won't be alone. You will have Ren and me to help you through whatever trials lie ahead."

Edited 2024-07-15 05:38 (UTC)

... and his mouth screws up tight, as his whole body stiffens and his eyes turn to petrified wood, as he shakes his head as if to clear it, with a low growl. It's not right, that everyone knows what he said, whatever his intentions, while Drake's insults fly entirely under the radar. For someone who'd insist he's as luckless as Magpie himself, he certainly has Ren's own luck.

But then, when has right ever come into anything? Get stabbed, eat the knife, pick yourself up and move on. That's all there is. "Wanting something won't make it so. There's too much between us. He has no more love for me than I do for him."

"I guess it's only fair for me to ask...how did he hurt you?" Ren ponders aloud. "I got here after the uh. Fight..."

It's telling that he doesn't even deny the word hurt. But he also doesn't reply, just shakes his head hard. No.

"I know, but... it's not my place to tell. What I can say that it is by far one of the worst things Drake could have said, and he knew precisely what he was doing." There, there. It's all right. He continues stroking Magpie's hair.

His Shadow looks at the two, but remains snuggled up to Ren for now. "It is rather unfair how your hurt goes unseen..."

He doesn't pull away from Crow's touch. "He didn't hurt me."

It's by far one of the least convincing things he's ever said.

Unfair his hurt goes unseen, huh...wonder how THAT could be. Ren sends up a silent prayer of thanks that his universe's Akechi Goro did not end up like this -- Magpie's Akira/Ren has some work ahead of him. This Akira/Ren is happy to keep snuggling for now, though.

Edited 2024-07-15 06:58 (UTC)

"Yes, you can say that it impacted Frog just as well, but I know it still hurt you. It hurt me to find out he'd gone so far, but we can only move forward." At least Magpie isn't pulling away. That's good. Crow continues on. "But Shadows don't lie. That his Shadow mentioned turning back the clock at all suggests that there is something more than mutual disdain, and the Palace may hold further truths in that respect... So what will you do?"

"It's still your choice," his Shadow says. "Only you can determine your feelings, as well as how to proceed."

Magpie sits there, tense in their embrace, for another long moment. Then he mutters something. "I talked to him once. When I was on my bike."

In other words, when he had his leathers and helmet on, and was unrecognisable.

Ren just has to let him talk. There's nothing he can add. (He's not a good enough Ren to understand an Akechi who doesn't throw himself into his arms, apparently.)

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