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[pancakeboy]

[Text him! Or do whatever, I'm not the police, and neither is he, thank God. Just specify if you want the more-fun-but-less-stable pre-11/20 guy or the grumpy third semester/postcanon guy. Pancake only for VRDR guys please, he's not third semester yet]

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[fogbornphantom]

"You'll still have contact with them. Even if they can't be with you physically, you'll have contacts. A support system." Really, he should know this. Then again, Falcon had similar doubts...

"Your younger self has benefited greatly from his connections. I'm sure you would too, if you let yourself. And that's not factoring in the possibility that your Ren could arrive any day."

[pancakeboy]

His lips purse briefly; the last thing he wants to think about, with what faces him tomorrow, is Ren coming here. "I don't mean the people. I have to be able to compartmentalise. Shit, you don't even have a name."

[fogbornphantom]

"But you can still take the time to come up with plans for how to navigate the dangers ahead. You can consider what you want to say to Ren and the others." But a name...

His face falls.

"We're... working on that. I've gotten suggestions here and there. Kou, Hiro, Keio, and others. It's a start, isn't it?"

[pancakeboy]

"Hiro. You could pick anything, and you go for that." It's... so bland. So faceless. "How are you writing them again?"

[fogbornphantom]

"It was Falcon's suggestion, and it's still just one possibility." Still, if Magpie finds it less appealing... hmm. "I suppose the choice in kanji could make all the difference. 'Hiro' has a rather diverse range of meanings, but part of why I've yet to settle is because it's hard to discern a name that suits me."

He pauses.

"Wait! This isn't supposed to be about me in the first place."

[pancakeboy]

"This is a conversation, isn't it? You're not a servant." He watches from his pillow, arm still folded beneath his head, lazily the way a cat watches.

[fogbornphantom]

"Well, yes, but I came here to support you." Damn it. It's not that Magpie is wrong, either. "Well, then. What would you suggest?"

[pancakeboy]

Huh. He half-saw the question coming, but it still catches him a bit unawares. He thinks about it for a moment.

After a second, he reaches for his phone. When he offers it, it bears a text window with a name written. Ryo, written with the characters for "companion" and "crow".

[fogbornphantom]

Oh! Crow's Shadow moves closer to take a better look, reaching for his chin in that typical Akechi fashion.

"Interesting. And certainly not unfitting..." Hmmm, very, very interesting. "Then again, I'd expect nothing less from you."

[pancakeboy]

"It doesn't exactly assert your independence." He takes the phone back, shutting it off and sliding it back onto the bedside table. "But perhaps you want to remember your roots."

It's better than Hiro, anyway. Though perhaps it's to be expected Falcon would go for something like that.

[fogbornphantom]

"Ha... That's the question, isn't it? What do I want?" Well, hopefully Magpie won't mind if he sits down. He'll try not to sit too close, at least. "I'm not used to prioritizing myself over others. To be honest, it drives Crow crazy."

[pancakeboy]

"Who'd have thought," he deadpans. As if they didn't just spend five minutes teasing out whether or not Kou-Hiro-Keio-Ryo can have thoughts of his own.

[fogbornphantom]

"I suppose I shouldn't take it for granted. It's been years, and he's taken so many steps to assert my validity, my identity..." He stops himself again. "But, again, I'm supposed to be helping you, not the other way around."

[pancakeboy]

"I don't need help." A bit of annoyance creeps in.

[fogbornphantom]

"Why are you so averse to people caring about you?" Oh, that little subtle edge is back. His eyes narrow slightly. "You deflect, but in doing so, neglect your needs. Again, I know how this works. I was literally born because Crow was exactly like that."

[pancakeboy]

Crossly, he sits up. "Did you come here just to annoy me? I have enough to worry about as it is."

Oops.

[fogbornphantom]

"No, I came here because I wanted to support you after what was an emotionally exhausting evening. Because I care." Still pouting here. It's not quite a glare, but sharper than normal.

[pancakeboy]

"Because it's easier than worrying about yourself, I know. Which is why you keep insisting we don't talk about you." He doesn't want to talk about himself.

And yet, tomorrow he's going to have to. In front of everyone.

[fogbornphantom]

"Does the same not apply to you? Could it be that because you're uncomfortable being vulnerable, it's easier to deflect the conversation onto another?"

The edge subsides, at least a little, but he remains firm. No running away from this, mister.

[pancakeboy]

"I'm not—" He hisses, crossing his legs. "Tell Crow from me he's had entirely too much therapy. It's ruined him."

[fogbornphantom]

"Therapy would have helped him avoid a blow up in the Palace as well as his haphazard way of confronting you earlier. He honestly felt obligated to be firm due to the amount of pressure he felt placed upon him, which hardly helped."

But, fine. If Magpie won't be honest, he can always make deductions. Hmm.

"Let's see... You're likely uncomfortable with the prospect of facing Drake. You're going to have to present yourself to a group that ranges from disdainful to neutral, with Crow and Ren being the rare exceptions who truly care. The prospect of turning back the clock undoubtedly doesn't sit well, when you feel as though your own feelings and the harm Drake has done to you has gone overlooked."

[pancakeboy]

Shit. He makes a sour face, and tries to turn away.

[fogbornphantom]

"And on some level, you wonder if you're even wanted there, or if you're just a key to fit a lock. The exact thing Crow actively wants to avoid, just so we're clear. He even emphasized how treating you in such a manner would make them no better than Shido."

Taking a chance, he scoots just a tiny bit closer. "These feelings are understandable."

[pancakeboy]

"It doesn't matter how I feel." He doesn't exactly reach for the Shadow, but he doesn't push him away. "You'll never get it. My feelings are irrelevant. They are a hindrance. I have to get through the mission. That's all."

[fogbornphantom]

"You're not a hindrance, and neither are your feelings! How could you say that about yourself?" Well... perhaps that's naive to ask. He winces at the realization. "Er... that is to say, I believe that by confronting and unpacking your feelings, you'll be in a healthier place for the mission, and you won't be neglecting your needs."