[ic] dynamite the dam on the flow

[pancakeboy]

[ooc: subsequent to this.]

With Raven hopefully reassured and now upstairs shepherding the kids, Magpie has swung into action.

The tangible shit is easy—check the first aid kit, start water for tea, make sure the stocks of bottled water, soup and so on are reasonably intact, and that nobody's left an upturned Featherman figure or spiky dinosaur anywhere too immediately lethal.

After a moment's thought, he switches on the kotatsu, even though spring is creeping closer. Then, with everything done that should be done, he checks over everything again, like an anxious hen. It's hard to shock him for long, and he's settling on a response, which is that if Sparrow's Ren wasn't already dead, he'd kill him.

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[fogbornphantom]

"...I'm sorry." Shit. More sniffles. Damn it. Why can't he just keep it together? Why can't he just be calm?

"This is so fucking stupid. He's already back. I shouldn't be acting like this. It's not like Konishi-san. It's not like her..."

But still, it hurts. It hurts so much.

[pancakeboy]

Damn it, and he was doing so well not thinking of his mother. Across Crow's face, he tries to catch Ren's eye; Crow will be fine. But what if he's not? whispers a voice inside him; he ignores it, using the hand on Crow's shoulder to pull himself a little closer.

"But you had nothing to do with bringing him back. You didn't predict it, You had no control, isn't that right?" Brown hair, and tears, and powerlessness; his stomach flips over.

[unfoggedlotus]

Ren lets out a shaky breath. "It's okay if you're not okay, Goro," he says, quiet. "It was pretty fucked up. Whether or not he's coming back. You just...don't deserve to suffer for it."

Gently, very very gently, he lifts Goro's hand up and lightly kisses it, then puts it back by his side.

[fogbornphantom]

Stupid tears. Goro buries his face in a gloved hand, just trying to calm his breathing. "I knew about the Shadow. I knew there was a chance." But he couldn't have known when. He couldn't have anticipated everything.

Rationally, they're right. He knows. He really does, it's just...

"It's such a cruel thing to do, leaving Sparrow to worry. I had hoped that my support would have dissuaded him from such recklessness."

[pancakeboy]

"So your support wasn't good enough either?" His hand moves around Crow's back, to his far shoulder; he lets himself lean against Crow's side, hopefully a reassuring weight and not a spiky one.

"Are you planning to blame that Ren for any of this? At some point? It was cruel, and reckless, and endangered both of you, and it was entirely his fault."

He presses the facecloth into Crow's hand.

[unfoggedlotus]

"That Ren wouldn't know how to make a decision that wasn't cruel if it bit his ass, stole his boots, 'n plucked his radishes." A little bit of Ren's latent country rage is slipping into his speech. He doesn't care. "You did your best to lead him to water. Ain't your fault he won't drink."

Ren takes Goro's glove off, twining their ring fingers together.

[fogbornphantom]

...Ren using his accent outside the bedroom? Goodness. That's enough to rouse Crow from his slump if only to send his boyfriend a curious look.

"...Logically, that's sound, but I still feel as though he deserves support because Maruki was the one who put him in that position." He digs the fingers of his other hand in his hair, grumbling in frustration. "So perhaps I am mad at him, but that doesn't mean I want him to suffer. Or that I think he deserved that death."

[pancakeboy]

Despite himself, Magpie squints over Crow's head. After how careful he's been to eliminate all the rough Shitamachi notes from his own speech, he feels a bit exposed. Where the hell did that dialect come from? Does his Ren do that?

"He didn't deserve it," he says, very abruptly, and very aware of his mode of speech. "Excuse me if I reserve judgement on whether he deserved to die. Regardless of that, nothing that happened is your responsibility, Crow. Sometimes, no matter what you do, people die." Ask him anything.

[unfoggedlotus]

Ren grunts, clearing his throat and removing any of the country from his speech under Magpie's stunned look. "Don't care whether or not he deserves it, at the end of the day. All I'm saying is he made his choices and you aren't responsible for them." He kisses the top of Crow's head.

[fogbornphantom]

"Rationally, I know you're both right. Emotionally... it's not so simple." Even so, he accepts the forehead kiss, giving his boyfriend a little nuzzle. "Sorry I'm being so difficult."

It's stupid. They're right. They're absolutely right, yet here he is, all pitiful.

[pancakeboy]

"Well, maybe you're being a little difficult." He squeezes Crow's shoulder. "But that's why we're here. Reinforcing positive messaging, or whatever the hell it is."

He takes his arm back, separating himself from their embrace. "If I bring some soup over, will you drink it, or just stare into it?"

[unfoggedlotus]

"We're here for you," Ren says, not sure what else he can say...then Magpie mentions cooking and Ren's nipping that in the bud. "I can make some comfort food for us...wanna get a movie started?"

[fogbornphantom]

Crow opens his mouth to comment when his phone suddenly vibrates. Squinting, he takes it out of his pocket and says, "Ah. Raven made arrangements. We may be receiving some soup and hot chocolate in the near future."

Because he knows that both Magpie and Ren will fret if he spends too much time on his phone he tucks it away. "That being said, if you still wish to cook, that's fine." And that goes for either one of them, really.

[pancakeboy]

Damn it, Ren, he's perfectly capable of pouring hot water into a cup. He flops back on to the couch. "No point if we're getting delivery. Who did he contact?" And how much do they know?

[unfoggedlotus]

Ren opens his mouth, but he's interrupted before he can say anything by a knock on the door.

"Think that's our delivery?" Ren asks, pressing a kiss to Crow's head. "I'm sure Raven wouldn't contact anyone who'd hurt us."

[fogbornphantom]

"...Well, he did contact the, ah. Alternate version of our mother." Magpie at least deserves that warning, so he doesn't get blindsided. "She doesn't have to stay, though, if it makes you uncomfortable."

[pancakeboy]

Quickly, he zips his mouth before he can come out with why would she make me uncomfortable, or I'll just hide in the bedroom, or something equally scintillating. "No, not at all. The more the merrier."

All that training to endure interminable mental torment has been leading to this moment.

[unfoggedlotus]

On instinct, Ren reaches out to Magpie, but thinks better of it after a few seconds. "It'll all be ok," he says, after a moment, in a way that could be meant for either or both of them. "Make sure Crow doesn't go anywhere. I'll be right back."

He kisses Crow's forehead one more time, then goes to get the door.

mama threadjack

[mamakechi]

When Ren opens the door, he finds Akako -- a bit frayed, perhaps, from the rush over here, but intact nonetheless -- carrying a large bisected tray; one half contains a steaming hotpot, and the other a large, warm pitcher.

"Raven reached out to me and asked for my help," she bows a bit, over the food. "I don't know what's going on, but I thought some comfort food wouldn't be amiss." She passes him the tray. "Zosui and hot chocolate, for everyone who needs it."

[unfoggedlotus]

"Oh, thank you," Ren says, bowing in response. "I'm sure Crow and Magpie will love it."

"It's no problem. I'm always happy to help." Once the food is firmly in Ren's hands, Akako bows once more and departs; Ren turns around with the heavy tray in hand and closes the door behind himself. "Akako made us zosui and hot chocolate!"

[fogbornphantom]

She left so fast. A pity. Crow would have liked to thank her personally, but he nods all the same. "That was very considerate of her. I'll have to send my regards a little later."

But perhaps it's for the best. Magpie would certainly find it uncomfortable if she stayed for too long.

[pancakeboy]

Magpie meets Akako's eyes from the couch, offering her a little bow. Then she's gone, and he finds himself both relieved and disappointed. "So will I. That will be an interesting conversation."

He gets up to help with the food, which hopefully will be within his capabilities. She made them soup. He feels ill; he looks to Ren, "Soup first, I take it?"

[unfoggedlotus]

"Whatever you want first," Ren sets the tray down on the coffee table. "I'll go get some utensils..."

[fogbornphantom]

"Soup is fine. Thank you." At the very least, he's starting to relax, though the absence of both Magpie and Ren leaves him slightly wilted.

The contact was nice. Ah well...

[pancakeboy]

At the kitchen table where he's setting out bowls, he looks up and offers Crow a little smile. It looks sadder than he realises. He taps the side of the pot, which is still hot, then opens it up.

A puff of steam fills the air. The soup is rich and golden, nothing like the pathetic broths his mother had made on her single electric ring. For a moment he hesitates, with the ladle in his hand, then presses his lips tight and starts to fill the bowls.